If I only had a brain…

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  Britni TheVadgeWig said,

  Thanks for this. I stated as much on the blog post I think you’re referring to, and as you know, I was called a hypocrite. When my entire point was exactly that– he said flat out “I don’t know what happened, but [here's my uninformed opinion of it].” I haven’t been able to bring myself back to look at the rest of the comments when I had been attacked so thoroughly in the few that I did see.

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  Champagne and Benzedrine said,

  I’m very flattered by the post, thank you.

  Last I checked there were about eight posts about the EF vs Epiphora drama and I honestly fail to see how any of the authors can claim to have any greater insight into the drama than I do (or rather, don’t.)

  I too read Piph’s post, which apparently gave you the authority to write about it, but unlike you I took it with a grain of salt. This is because I do consider Piph to be negative, and have called her out on her negativity before.
  Ergo, the concept of EF banning her for negativity wasn’t, from my point of view, exactly beyond the realms of possibility.

  Brit’s delightful little contribution really was the pot calling the kettle black. She’d already written a post about the EF drama before I did, and I still fail to see how she feels qualified to discuss the issue yet I, amongst others, aren’t.

  I think it’s more of a case of her not liking the fact I didn’t automatically jump on the Epiphora fan-wagon and was willing to consider that there might be more to the story than Piph was willing to share.

  But yeah, ultimately you’re absolutely right – I quantified my blog with “I don’t really know much about…” and so maybe I shouldn’t have written it. But by that same logic, I think you’d have a tough time arguing that anybody else – Britni especially – was any better informed than I was – and they still blogged their little hearts out.

  At least I admitted my ignorance.

  (Also, your whole penis/vulva metaphor was very clever and beautifully written but you might want to tone down the sexist generalizations because they kind of undermine the authority with which you label people as misogynistic.)

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  Elodie said,

  Some of those posts freaked me out. And I sat there going, why am I freaking out? Why am I scared? I haven’t felt like this since… high school. When I was sexually harassed for years.

  People try to say something serious and get jokes about flogging thrown back in their faces. EF is supposed to have a forum where people feel comfortable talking about sex? Or is it supposed to be a forum where people are FORCED to talk about sex? Where their serious concerns are disregarded and mocked in a sexual manner? By employees of the company?

  I won’t deal with a company that tolerates — encourages — that behavior. I was already legally required to deal with it for years. I’m not 15 any more.

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  Epiphora said,

  This post is glorious in every way. Also, going from stroking of shaft to spewing diarrhea made me sick. Which means, you win at life.

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  Sarahbear said,

  @ C & B: I’m glad that you’re flattered, but I do need to point out that this post wasn’t just about your blog post. There are several commenters to the threads on the EF forums who have said as much as you have in a similar fashion. Some of them even started their own ‘dramalicious’ threads, yet continue to accuse the ‘cliques’ of being the ones perpetuating drama.

  I can not vouch for the other authors insight to the situation. Some people may be privy to more information than others. Specifically those who have worked with EF in the past and had first hand experience (such as Essin’ em, AAG, Sarah Sloane, and ThatToyChick). They certainly have enough information to color their opinions on this matter and express their thoughts on some of the behind the scenes things that we are unaware of. It’s up to their readers whether or not to trust their accounts of what happened.

  Others, such as myself, have at least been active and contributing members of the forums. In doing so, you can be kept up to date with some of the things going on at EF. You can use their search feature to look for every single post that Epiphora participated in or was mentioned in and then sort them by date or relevance. You can follow Epiphora’s profile on EF and it will show you her recent activity within the community, including votes and comments left on reviews. The voting system is public, you know? The only information we aren’t able to access, regarding Epiphora and EF, is anything that went down in the private messaging system. So, you basically choose to continue to remain ignorant of what’s going on while still maintaining your opinion based on your interactions with Epiphora outside of the EF community, which should have absolutely no bearing on her conduct within the community.

  While I think it’s pretty dumb to have an opinion about something you don’t care enough to do much research on, I reckon you are still entitled to that uninformed opinion. My real issue with the entire ordeal is that those of us who disagree with what happened are consistently said to be ‘jumping on the Epiphora fan-wagon’. We’re called cliquish, we’re accused of perpetuating drama. If the things we’re doing are causing drama, cliquish or promoting negativity then every single person who posted in those threads and/or wrote their own blog post about it is guilty of the exact same crimes. So indeed, lets all start introducing ourselves as pots and kettles, huh? The difference in all of those blog posts and yours, though, is that they disagreed with the decision and announced their reasons for leaving the community (a boycott, if you will), and not a single one of them insulted people who want to continue supporting EF. If you had enough information to back up your opinion then you wouldn’t need to insult those of us who disagree in order to validate your viewpoint.

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  PandaDementia said,

  Unless I’m missing some of C&B’s comments on other posts, I fail to see how he was insulting anyone who supported Epiphora. In his own post, he stated that the fuss was “disingenuous” and referred to the “Epiphora-clique” but even in the comments of that post when HE was insulted, he didn’t insult anyone back.
  The fact is, though, he didn’t need to do any “research” about the incident because his point was not that Epiphora was necessarily in the wrong and that EF was necessarily in the right OR that anyone who decided to stop supporting EF was overreacting or anything like that. What he was saying is that revoking EF’s sex-positivity “license” just because of this incident was ridiculous. Which it is.
  Also, you don’t need to be an EF contributor to search for Epiphora (who I like and respect, BTW) and see that a number of her comments in the forum were unnecessarily negative. Was that a good reason for the banning? Maybe. Did EF go about it in the right way? Certainly not.

  And Britni, pointing out that you’re being immature and hypocritical is NOT an attack on you. The only person in those comments who attacked ANYONE was YOU and the Anonymous dick who said you sounded “drugged up and crazy.”

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  Sarahbear said,

  @ PandaDementia:

  Would you not be insulted if someone suggested (every single time) that your opinions were based on your alliances? That you were over-reacting? I think something like 8/10 of C&B’s most recent blog posts have been sparked by something he didn’t agree with on either Britni and Epiphora’s (or some other feminist type blog). In his situation I am not referring to that singular blog post (and there are even certain points I agree with him on).

  And I already said, in the beginning of my comment to him, that there are several people who have commented in the forum post and who made other posts about it who have stated they have no idea what is going on. You may feel that her comments were unnecessarily negative (which would certainly be easy considering the inflation of voting and ‘Great Review!’ comments that are left on nearly every review), but some see them as honest, though untactful. I’m not disputing the validity of some people’s opinions of the situation. I get that there are plenty of people who agree with what happened, and I support those opinions. What is irritating is seeing people accused of trying to continue drama, of just being some sort of Epiphora fan-girl based on my personal opinion on the situation. It’s even more irritating when those same accusers admit they haven’t bothered to read the forums, particularly the fucking forum post pertaining to the situation.

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  M.E. said,

  This post is glorious, all things are correct and very clear. Thanks

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  Heather said,

  I as an adult have learned that high school was way less drama filled then the “adult” lives you all claim to lead. It sad to see so many adults argue over some of the silliest stuff. Fighting over wiether someone can have an oppion is dumb. Everyone has them informed or not.

  I don’t follow any of your blogs other than sarahs so no I don’t know what’s going on however I AM only commenting on how childish the majority of you act. Using big words and sob stories to make you look more informed is retarded.

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  Champagne and Benzedrine said,

  Sarahbear – as Panda kindly pointed out, I never actually argued about whether or not Epiphora deserved being banned or not – although I did say ‘it wouldn’t surprise me in the slightest’ if she did.

  By the way, this:

  “Perhaps, if I only had a penis, I too would get my balls cradled in the hands of my readers as they lovingly stroked and sucked my shaft. I could spew my oblivious mental diarrhea onto the pages as my audience lapped it up like it was the sweetest semen they ever tasted.”

  Well, in all honesty I was fairly impressed by that. Seriously, it’s pure poetry. I’m not even being sarcastic. It’s hypocritical and sexist, but beautifully written.

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  Sarahbear said,

  I’m glad you like it because I was pretty proud of myself for coming up with it. I don’t really care if it’s hypocritical and sexist, because it was awesome. =p

  I likely would not have been as put off by your blog post had you not mentioned an Epiphora fan-club, because you do have a point and you were open to the discussion when PD pointed out it was more likely the straw that broke the camels back, rather than that one action itself that caused the insanity.

  Plus, it’s not just your post (or even that one post) that sparked this one.

• Choices and new vibes. – What a buzz! « Toys in Love said,

  [...] fellow reviewers and sex-bloggers got this week. – If you follow the sex toy community just a little bit, you’ll know that Epiphora got banned, booted and thrown out of the EdenFantasy. – [...]

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