You know you’re spending too much time on something when…

Posted by Sarahbear on June 5, 2010

Zzzzzzzz

you start having insane dreams about sex toy retailers. For two nights in a row I have had the craziest dreams about the world I seem to be engrossed in right now.

First dream: The UPS man knocked on my door and it was a huge package from EdenFantasys. I was kind of shocked because I hadn’t requested anything to review or purchased anything from them in a while. When I opened it, it was a ton of lingerie that I had apparently won in some sort of contest. All was well until I emptied the box and there were several letters and pictures in the bottom. A lot of the EF staff had written me letters about how I was wrong for entering their contests. They also had lots of group photos of them all giving me ‘the finger’ and telling me how I didn’t deserve any of the prizes.

I then got on twitter and tweeted something about how I had tried to do things pretty quietly and politely but now I was going to blog about that shit. Then I wrote this long blog about how I never wrote anything announcing my intentions and that I had been still weighing my options, but this meant war. I said that I had entered the contest long before all that drama happened and they weren’t going to bully me and get away with it.

It was crazy.

Second Dream: The next night I dreamed that Vibrator.com was having an Intimate Organics contest. I fell in love with their products and was telling my mother and grandmother to enter to win. My grandma wrote a confused comment on the contest like ‘I WANT IT BUT DON’T KNOW HOW TO ENTER.’ or something. Then my mom and aunt convinced my grandma to do the video entry, where she was in a corset and showing the non-sexual ways to use a Hitachi.

Sigourney Weaver was the president and owner of Vibrator.com and her 15 year old son was being punished and had to count entries for the contest. He thought my grandma was gross and funny so he made this page to make fun of her. Lots of people joined in, leaving comments, so I called John (the guy with their review program) and told him that I didn’t understand why a sex positive company was making fun of an older woman being comfortable wearing a corset. He was just as appalled as I was and took down the page immediately. I wrote a blog post praising Vibrator.com and John for his quick fix of the problem.

WTF? Those dreams are both so all over the place. I have been spending more time on reviews this week and keying in entries for my contest into a spreadsheet. Maybe they’ll go away after my contest is over.